09 October 2006

dave matthews, pro wrestling and the bible.

dalton: this was an email to you that somehow never got sent, so now, it's a post. sweet. good for me.

you remember when we were all stoned up at the cantebury and invented all these sweet concepts for sports-list shows. (best all-time here, hold-my-dick-while-i-win-the-game moments; best gamefaces of all time; best all-time i-needed-to-show-my-anger-out moments) along those same curvy, caligraphic lines: after reading your dream job piece i was thinking about what my dream job will look like. and it will be a job where i keep a running diary of whatever-i-like during an event in which i have no active role. as an example, espn's simmons kept running diaries of baseball playoff games, and sometimes the rapid juxtaposition of things is pretty choice -

6:51 -- Placido Polanco (not a stage name) knocks Inge home by slicing a double down the right-field line, causing McCarver to say, "That is PURE Polanco." I was just thinking that. That prompts a visit from the Yankees pitching coach, Charles Bronson.

6:52 -- We just learned that Sean Casey enjoys Dave Matthews, pro wrestling and the Bible. As I'm digesting this info, he scorches a doubles to left. And it's a five-to-THREE ballgame! Come on, Tigers!

6:56 -- Let's make this clear once and for all: the question isn't "what if a comedian ran for president?" It's "what if somebody was dumb enough to make a movie where Robin Williams played a comedian who ran for president?"

i'm very attracted to the idea of keeping a running diary during a barn raising. or a filibuster. or a walkathon.

2 comments:

huntsmanic said...

senator kennedy looks to be falling asleep, right there up at the podium. his head is drifting down and left... but now it snaps back up! his face is filled with righteous fury! which is to say, it looks as though someone filled his mouth with cinnamon dentyne without telling him. my girlfriend did that to me once; it was really horrible.

anon said...

...Or you could write a novel during NaNoWriMo from rehab. Like Davey's going to.

On a side note, I too could use a blow job. Giving, receiving, whatever.
--M